Volunteer Work in Vietnam: Ho Khoang Cha
27th of September to 9th of October, 2024.
I wasn’t ready for this volunteer work or for anything coming out of it. And I really wish I was. One of my sentences to Kuba in our last night at Ben’ place was everything will change after Vietnam. And it did. And I can’t stop wondering what would’ve happened if I was back then the Lei I am right now, or better saying, if I was already myself again as I am now.
The place is magical to start. Surrounded by gorgeous mountains, jungle and right next to a river, which we can constantly hear and sleep with the sound of it. Every time I look up to those mountains, I almost cannot believe how beautiful they are, and how close they are to our house. Its just in our backyard, and it’s almost as we can touch them with our bare hands. Its shape is also very especial. For me, it looks like the top part of a heart. Some people would say it looks like a camel. Laugh. The river is lovely and clean. A small pool is formed up stream, not so deep, so we can swim there without issues. There’s even a tiny waterfall, due to a tiny dam, if I can call it like that. It’s quiet and peaceful here. Our little paradise.
The main house, where almost all of us are staying, apart from Kuba, has the second floor almost complete, while the first floor, where the kitchen, living room and bathrooms are, is still in process. The whole building is absolutely gorgeous, made almost entirely of wood, big and fatty wooden beams and pillars, and the lovely windows, with its many glasses. Everything looks retro and super cool, and I love it! The room upstairs are spacious and gorgeous! The kitchen is just perfect, with lots of space for many people to cook at the same time, and the windows allow a lot of sunlight to entire, plus the fresh air.
The work is vast but to be constantly discussed and arranged. What I mean is, there is loads to do but we need to understand what is for us to do, and what the villagers who come to help must do. They are mostly doing heavier tasks like, building outside steps for the second house, and rearranging the grounds, and that’s creating new paths here and there, to the river, or simply arranging big stones around certain areas. It’s hard work, and in all these tasks they make a wonderful job!
Nicky, Mika, Kuba and I are doing other smaller tasks. We sand the concrete walls, paint them, sort out the tools, tide up many areas, move big blocks of wood, doors and windows, to another area, always trying to make the main house look more ready. Niki is a wonderful artist and she creates some gorgeous wooden plates, drawing magnificent patterns on it. Mika is helping with hanging some lamps, and sanding some wooden pieces. We also have a local guy who comes to do some deeper work with the wood, but he doesn’t come very often. Kuba improves the main path to the river significantly, making look like there wasn’t any path before; and he also help the locals with the paths, or creating an outside stone table, which we celebrate with some beers and snacks after. I will also mention that he built a cave but I won’t give you any more details, so the rest is for your imagination. I was… well, I started cleaning the glasses of the windows, trying to let more light getting through them, but soon I realized it was a waste of time, as it would take way to long to clean them all. So I started a new project together with Niki, which was to decorate some of the downstairs walls; she would do the drawings and I would create wooden shelves and plant vases to it.
The distribution of the cooking is very interesting. Almost every morning, Kuba and I would make breakfast. Most of the mornings he prepared a lovely rice porridge, but sometimes we also had pancakes. One morning he made some apple rings, which I loved it! To go with all these amazing food, we would delight ourselves with a delicious Vietnamese coffee. Then for lunch and dinner, we would take turns, where if Niki and Mika make lunch, Kuba and I would clean the dishes and be in charge of dinner. All of this process is awesome! I just love how it works well, and everybody does something at some point. Plus, I really enjoyed cooking with Kuba.
The food is almost always vast and delicious! At the very beginning, we are a bit confused about shopping for ourselves, as we have to borrow the motorbikes from our neighbours to go to the main road and get the groceries, but once we get into it, everything is fine. We always come up with some great recipes, with enough diversity, and some delicious dishes arise, like Niki deep fried tofu in tomato sauce. We also have some lovely spices mix, which is “called” jungle magic, and that’s all the extension of our knowledge about it; some peanuts and seeds savory mix, which goes wonderfully with basically everything; we get one package of a special coffee which contains some notes of cocoa, and it’s absolutely delicious.
We have got also a big cartoon of condensed milk to have in our coffee, and it’s the first time I see one little of condensed milk. We use it a lot in Brazil for our desserts, cakes and its icing, and our most traditional candy, the brigadeiro, just not ever in our coffee. But as they say, once in Rome, due as the Romans do, and the Vietnamese people just love their coffee with condensed milk.
One of the stars of our staying here is a curious plant: mugwort. Our host Ben introduced it to the guys, speaking of its miraculous and endless benefits. Some of them being connected to “relaxing” effects, if I may call it like that. Either by drinking as a tea, or smoking it in a pipe, you should experience some interesting dreams. But honestly, more than its effects, either they are for real or not, what I like the most is the jokes we can make about it.
Our host, Ben, would spend most of the days in Hanoi, where he lives and works. He is a nice guy, and I am OK with doing the things with the guys, being on our own, but… that’s just not what Workaway is about it, you know what I mean? I like the independence, and not feel tracked by the host all the time, but part of me simply cannot accept this division, and I do think we should work together with our hosts. The few times he comes by he always bring us some nice ingredients, some nice treats, and we manage to have some meals together.
In one of my first nights, I find in my room, the biggest spider I have ever seen! At first, I really thought it was a fake one, a prank from the guys, but soon I realized it is for real. I call the three of them to come and see it, and I think it’s the biggest spider we all have ever seen. Kuba is the bravest one to get his hand really close to it, so we can have on camera a slight idea if its size. But I still think it is way bigger than it looks in the photo. Kuba and I manage to shush it outside my window, and we all carry on with our night. But when I come up again a few minutes later, inside my wardrobe there is a spider which looks exactly the same. I really think it is the same. When Kuba comes to look he says that this one is bigger. As we check outside my window, the first spider is still there, so yep! There is a second one, even bigger than the other. Again, Kuba helps me to get rid of this one, but this time it is a bit more challenged, but also funnier.
Throughout all out time together, Kuba and I were always teasing each other. For me, it reminded me a lot of my joking and playful way with my friends back in Brazil, so I didn’t give much importance at first. But then at some point things changed, and I started looking at him in a different way. I was looking forward for us to spend time together, for example, or to see him first thing in the morning. The truth is that, since the first time I saw him I thought he was very handsome and charming, and I wanted to kiss him. Now, for me that’s a huge surprise as that almost never happen to me. So I pushed away that thought, and forgot about it for the next few days. But as we got closer to each other and I got to know him a bit more, I realized that he is such a nice guy, and he is always helping me with something, or looking after me when I needed. Again, that’s very unusual for me, as I am always looking after myself, and I am not really used to being helped in that way. It’s really the small things, you know? Like helping me with the spiders; looking after my wrist when it got hurt while carrying the wood; giving me some pills when I got stomachache; suggesting a great hostel to stay in Hanoi when we all had to run away from Ben’s place… wait, what? Hold on! We are just not there yet.
Eventually, the teasing turned into some provocative stuff, and some small touches here and there are added to our relationship. When cooking together, there is always pieces of this or that ingredient being fed from one to another; and then the eventual fight and run after each other. When it got to a point where I could barely resist to his perfume, or to the idea of hugging him from behind, and kissing his neck, when I would first see him in the morning, I decide to do something, because I wanted to be with him.
On that day, we went shopping together for the first time. As I sat behind him in the motorbike, instead of holding on the back of the scooter, I held on him, with my arms around his chest, in a very comfortable and heartwarming position. That day, we make a huge groceries shopping, as we were expecting two new French volunteers to come and join us. But as we get back home, things start to change. I have a slight premonition that something bad would happen, and I even tell everybody to be careful and look after themselves today, because I thought it would be something more physical, like an accident or something.
At first, Ben calls Kuba and tell him that Mika should go to the police station and bring our passports with him. Mika does that but comes back without our passports. Bad sign. In the evening, we are told by the neighbours that we all must go to the police station. We don’t know exactly what all this is about but we know that’s something to do with foreigners not being allowed to stay that long at a local’s house, or in Ben’s case, even worse, as he is not a local from this region. So we joke around, of course, and I say that I don’t want to be arrested again, remembering that stupid time in Egypt, and even at the police station, while waiting for some paper work to be done, and trying to take a hidden photo at the same time, we joke around.
Everything seems to be fine, and they let us know with the “warning” of leaving on the date that we say we would leave, which is about 10 days for me, Mika and Nicky, and two or three days for Kuba.
We are relieved, of course, and before heading home we buy some beers to drink away the stressful evening. Tonight we were planning to cook some dinner to our neighbours, but as everything turned out like that, we just make some instant noodles for ourselves and drink our beers. We play card games, poker, we dance, we smoke mugwort (yes, WE, because even I decided to give it a try after the happening), and we have lots of fun.
The kids (at some point, Kuba and I started calling them “the kids” while him and I were “dad” and “mum”. Don’t ask…) go to bed, and very few minutes after that, Kuba and I kiss. I haven’t kissed anyone in three years! I actually haven’t realized that until now. Three years! I think that’s my record. Laugh. Anyway, Kuba is a very nice, sweet and thoughtful guy, so I am happy that we got together. For me, it was not a moment of irrational passion, where people just follow their most wild instincts, no. I gave a lot of thoughts to the idea, as I had a lot to consider and was going under a lot of things, and Kuba was the perfect guy for that moment.
But we didn’t have much time for romance as in the right next morning we were told we had to leave Ben’s place by the afternoon. Apparently, if we didn’t, he would have to pay some big fees for having us overstaying. We were all very disappointed but I felt as I was the only one really pissed. The only reason why I was not really angry is because of what had recently happened to me in Amritsar. After that, I feel like I take all the other “bad” things way more calmly. And I am a calm person!
The problem for me was all the implications that leaving earlier from Ben’s place would have in my travel plans. I already had a volunteer work settled in Laos, and all the remaining days of staying in Vietnam planned. Now, I would have to find a way to fit these extra 10 days somewhere in between. Plus, I was kind of looking forward to spend more time with Kuba, even though if only a few days, here in our little paradise. So, yeah, I was pissed!
As we didn’t have to work because we were been kicked out, we enjoyed a slow morning. We had our last breakfast together, and I even hugged Kuba in the kitchen, from behind, and kissed his neck, as I wanted to do it for a while. During breakfast we decided to have a wonderful last meal together, lunch, and not the last supper, as we joked so much sometime before. We created a lovely menu, where we could have some of our favourites dishes while staying here, so everybody could prepare something. For me, it sounded like that scene in The Signs, the move from 1998 with Mel Gibson, where as they think they will all die, on their “last supper”, they all get to choose their favourite dish to be cooked.
Lunch is a blast and we feel and eat like kings and queens! We even have some beers left from last night for the cherry of the cake! The food is amazing, as it had been for a while now, but we still feel sorry for all the nice ingredients we have acquired and wanted to use. We let the neighbours have all the food which was available in the kitchen, apart from the coffee, just to make sure that nothing would be spoiled, as Ben would not be coming here for over a month.
After lunch, we have our last coffee together. Well, I wanted to have the last coffee with the four of us, but as all the kids from the neighbourhood came to say goodbye to Mika (they grew very attached to each other during the time we were here), Kuba suggested we just had out coffee the two of us, and enjoy our last moments here. And it was great! I still remember sitting in our coffee spot outside, in the first area we actually cleaned from the wood, and having a great time, even thought quite short, as soon we had to leave.
But this story is still not finished as we still need an ending, so here it goes…
I was planning to go to Hanoi to buy new glasses, as I really needed, and also another second hand backpack, because the zipper of my small one was gone. So I made a plan of spending three nights in Hannoi, in a hostel, getting these things sorted, and making a new travel plan.
At first, only Kuba wants to join me on hitchhiking to Hanoi, and the kids are taking the bus. Gladly, they decide to join us in our adventure, and hitchhike for the first time in “international waters”, so we would all hitchhike together. I am super excited! I love when people decide to hitchhike!
Kuba suggests a great hostel where he had stayed before, cheap but very nice, and with a delightful breakfast, and we both book beds there. I don’t know why, perhaps for not knowing exactly what the two of us wanted, or what to expect of this new step on our relationship, but none of us thought of booking a private room somewhere. I know I wouldn’t mind, I would rather actually, but everything was just happening so fast, that I simply book a bed in the dorm and let him know. He did the same so at least we were staying in the same room, even though it was with, most likely, other six people. Bummer!
We leave later than my ideal time for hitchhiking, in middle afternoon, but we didn’t want to rush or anything, so we took it easy. The neighbours take us to the main road in their motorbikes. We and all our backpacks. Once in the main road, we start walking towards outside the town. I still have my Hanoi sign with me, so as we walk, I’m holding the sign. I tell Kuba that, as most likely we will not get a lift for the four of us altogether, plus the backpacks, when we get a straight lift to Hanoi we should let the kids go first, and we can find something for ourselves after.
That’s not needed, as miraculously, the three lifts we get have enough space for us all. The first two cars are with a single male driver, and they both take us some significant distance, and to strategic spots, but we all agree later that it would’ve been better if we had focus on someone going straight to Hanoi. A bit of misunderstanding on communication too, as the second guy kind of let us believe he was actually going to Hanoi.
All the cars stopped for us while we were still walking. The third and last car it happened only a little bit after Niki took a very nice photo of Mika and I walking alongside the road, with me holding our Hanoi sign. This car, a mini-van, is packed with a family, but they have the exact number of seats we need available: four. As their trunk is a bit packed, and the driver is unable to lock it properly, so it is actually opened for the whole trip, we have to carry part of our backpacks with us. In the opposite of the other two cars, this time Kuba sits by my side, and because the space is limited, plus with his backpack in our laps, and my small backpack also with me, we are kind of dragged and packed into each other. It is the most pleasant uncomfortable situation ever. It felt so good just to be travelling with someone that you like by your side. In my case, for the very first time. And I still remember the look in his eyes whenever I would lift up my head from his shoulder, worried about our backpacks in the trunk, and then I would look at him: it was a very sweet kind of look, partially assuring me, without any words, that the backpacks were safe, but also something else, which I am not entirely sure what was it, but it just felt really good.
10 Years Around the World 